Senior Year Quotes Compiled by Kassie, Second Semester

“It’s fiiiiiiine. It’ll be fine.” And “What the fuck is going on?” –themes for the semester

“It’s all hearsay.” –Kassie about her relationship with Jon

“Slut!” –Noah about pregnant women.

“Oh, I’m so pale and romantic and coughing.” –Kassie about Claire, who has consumption.

Cape Horn / gay porn

“Did they wear ear pantyhose?” –Feliz

Claire: “He doesn’t have herpes, it’s genital warts.” Anne: “Cool.”

“I have a thing for pregnant women.” –Meredith

“This is what my grandfather drank right before he died.” –Colin about Pabst Blue Ribbon Light

“That’s a public place. He acknowledged you there.” –Claire about sex in the bathroom

Jon: “This scotch is aged eighteen years.” Noah: “Just like my last girlfriend.”

Alex: “What kind of shirts?” Feliz: “Commemorative t-shirts.”

“40s are great. You may drink too much, but you won’t drink too little.” –Claire

“Well, I think you should keep it elevated.” –Anne about Feliz’s injured face

“Why don’t you get the pretzel rods?” and “I gave Josh saran-wrap head.” –Feliz, causing us to go into a laughing fit in the Coop store.

Feliz: “For $30,000, you could get 300 strippers.” Margot: “Or one really big stripper.”

“I can run the fastest, I can think the fastest, I can pee the fastest, and don’t you forget it.” –Feliz in the bathroom at Table Manners.

“Drinking increases my need for beef.” –Erin

“I heard your friend is a big, cheap…beer-drinking person.” –Jon to Feliz about Hope

“I like my things big.” –Feliz

“You know that dumb girl, the one who’s really smart?” –Claire about Sarah Ball

“Come on, seat us, you bitches!” –Kassie at the Sagehen Café

Feliz: “Was it a little brown dog?” Michael: “Did you see a little brown dog?”

A typical conversation at KD: Feliz: “Those fuckin’ Chileans, man.” Alex: “Chileans? Where?” Feliz: “In Chile.”

Jon: “Are you attracted to Patty?” Pete: “I’m attracted to her bubble butt.”

“I have a waist and hips. I could bear children.” –Jon

“I don’t call, I don’t write, I don’t care.” –Feliz about guys.

“That’s one step away from having sex with men for money.” –Feliz about the girl who had her thong and half her butt showing at KD.

“Sometimes when I see Jon in the daylight I get confused. I’m like, who is that person?” –Kassie to Monika at lunch in the greenhouse.

Jon: “You know when you say something you mean, you know?” Pete: “I think that’s the vaguest thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

“Want to see my ‘I’m hot and dumb’ look?” –Kassie at the Blackwatch

“Whatever. I have two intellectual feet on him.” –Margot about the tall Pitzer guy.

“My bronchitis is like terrorism. I can’t let it change my daily life.” –Alex, explaining why he has been smoking even more cigarettes than usual despite his hacking cough.

“I’ve always wanted to start a phone sex hotline for pedophiles. Hi, I’m really hot right now.” –Becky in her best baby voice.

“Wow, that was a really long game of chess.” –Erin to Chris after he didn’t call her.

“My nose is a cavern of death.” –Jon

“I’m trying to suck the liquid out of my pants.” –Gretchen

“F.E.E.—Fried Egg Erickson.” –the name of Kassie and Jon’s offspring according to Feliz and Alex.

“So how does Tim lay the pipe?” –Alex to a shocked Monika.

“It’s ok to love the world. It’s our home.” –Feliz

Monika: “Jon, your girlfriend is a skinny-ass biatch.” Jon: “I like it.” Pete: “I’ll take it.” (drunk conversation getting in the car after staying at the Blackwatch until it closed).

“I was about to go home. Then Jon sat on me and poured beer in my mouth.” –Feliz (this is not an exaggeration).

“Do we have to join the team?” –Feliz

Kassie: “Sometimes you remind me of a bird.” Jon: “Sometimes I remind myself of a bird.”